All of the below are based on eating 80% or more raw food daily.
1. I feel cleaner inside and out (teeth are cleaner, etc.)
2. I don’t have to scrub pots, pans, or dishes when I eat raw.
3. I don’t need to use deodorant.
4. I feel so much lighter and more satisfied after eating.
5. I don’t have the sugar highs and lows when I don’t have sugar.
Seriously. I get mild headaches, a sugar buzz, and a major energy crash
when I have sugar now.
6. I have so much more energy.
7. The food is delicious.
8. I love the smugness. *devilish grin*
9. I’m proud of myself for not putting crap in my body.
10. It makes perfect sense – the food I’m eating is what humans ate 50,
100, 250, 1000 years ago (though prepared and combined differently).
It’s what we were designed to eat, period.

I don’t think I’ll ever go 100% raw, but after struggling a lot with
milk chocolate-covered peanuts over the last 2-3 weeks and after being
more flexible about what I’m eating in general for the past month, wow,
I see the difference. I need to go back to no sugar and 80% or more raw.
I’ve been better the last few days and I haven’t bought those damn
peanuts since Wednesday or Thursday. *pat, pat* I’ve also been
exercising daily since last Monday, except for Thursday. I’ll also miss
tonight due to a board meeting, but I’m proud of myself. I was on a
backslide and gained 5 or 7 pounds over the past month (steady 235 now)
but I’ve made an authorized YOU-turn and am back on track (except for
80% raw – it’s more like 55-65%, but better).

Oh, one more thing – Dee saw me yesterday and said, “You’ve lost weight.
You’ve lost a lot of weight!” I nodded and she said how good I looked. I
shared how I was so sick and had had enough, and weight loss wasn’t my
goal. She shared how her son is trying to lose weight, charting his
progress and everything. He decided to eliminate one thing at a time,
starting with Starbucks and is now not having his nightly huge bowl of
ice cream. He had one huge bowl recently and got sick, wow. She’s
thinking about joining him. At the end, she said, “I’m rooting for you!”
That was very sweet and I appreciate it! But I’m concerned, frankly. I
don’t want her thinking I’m trying to lose weight. That’s not the point
of this to me. But it was a validating conversation. *smile*

That reminds me – I hate sugar. It is so addicting. I had this
compulsion to keep getting and eating those damn chocolate-covered
peanuts. I’d eat a full package and feel sick, but do it again and
again. My energy was quite low all that time, I felt bloated and
slightly queasy, but I couldn’t stop. The need was so damn strong. I
finally said enough and decided to try to go one week without sugar last
Friday. I failed right away at Members Appreciation Day at the de Young
on Saturday. I had 4 cookies with my tea. They were yummy, but I got
high, a slight headache, and a sugar crash immediately. That hit me
hard. I had one cookie as a Trader Joes sample yesterday. Very, very
delicious, but again, buzz, headache, crash. That did it for me. I’m
still craving sugar, to be honest, and I had a very, very hard time not
getting the peanuts, but I don’t like what sugar does to me. I don’t
want to feel like that anymore. Yuck. I made a I am Bliss chocolate
hazelnut pie from Cafe G on Sunday to help me through this period. Jason
loved the slice I gave him. Today was Teacher Appreciation, and I didn’t
have the apple pie a la mode. *beam* I had a chocolate Larabar instead
(which I brought with me). Good for me! But fuck, I gotta do this again.
Ah, well. Better now than later.

I knew I’d slip up, and now I have. I will again, and that’s ok. But for
now, I’m doing much better. *smile*

Wow. The theme over the past 2 weeks seems to have been sugar, sugar, sugar. I’ve mostly been unable to stop myself from eating Trader Joe’s milk chocolate-covered peanuts, sometimes to the tune of one box a day. I’ve also had 3 cookies in one day twice (Sunday and Monday) as well as 3 slices of cake today.

I’m amazed at this sudden need for sugar, but it’s a really strong craving. It’s like I need it. I don’t even really want the taste that much, but it’s a real need. I feel like crap when I have sugar. Today after my first slice of cake, I felt woozy and I swear to you I felt this high – not euphoria, but like I was drugged.

I’ve decided I can’t stand this and I need to get away from sugar again. I don’t like what it’s doing to my body, to my state of mind, and to my palate. I am finished with sugar after today’s last sugar low.

In other munchy news… I hadn’t changed what I was eating for the most part over the past two weeks… until Sunday. On Sunday was the agency BBQ and I had 2 hot dogs, one veggie burger, and 3 cookies. Yesterday was a work appreciation BBQ, so I had 2 hot dogs and 3 cookies. I felt so much heavier and I could feel a huge difference in how my body was digesting the food. I’m convinced – a lot of raw food really is the way to go, even if you don’t go completely raw. It feels so much better, lighter, and cleaner inside and out. I’m sold. Time to go back to raw food.

One interesting thing happened – Beth and I planned to go out to eat on Friday before Happy Hour. I made it clear I was open to options and suggested a pizza place… but nope. Beth wanted Cafe G!!! So we did that instead with Katy and Veronica. Beth started talking about raw food a bit, explaining the basics, and telling them how much better she feels after she eats there. I was really surprised. Wow. She’s not a convert, no way, but she has been talking about becoming much more aware of what she eats and of how good she feels every time she goes to Cafe G. Amazing – living by example is really powerful.

Weight loss news – I put on 5 pounds. But I got a boost tonight at Stacy and Tim’s baby-gender-announcement party. Soon after I got there, mah said she noticed I’d lost some weight, so I told her a bit about how it all started and what I’m doing. As I did that, I noticed Roberta on my left telling someone that I’d never met that I’d lost a lot of weight (I missed what else she said, but I think it was about changing my food) and Stacy on my right emphatically nodding with one other person (not sure who) nodding too. Later in the evening, Stefanie asked me if I’d lost weight and she said she really noticed it in my face, shoulder, and chest above the bust. Wow. So It’s still noticeable. *beam*

I need to go back to rawing it… not necessarily to lose weight, but to feel better. I also need to exercise (which I haven’t really been doing) to maintain energy levels and to tone up. I’m flabby and I really hate it. My arms are embarrassing to me now and with summer coming, ixnay. Serious arm toning is needed. *nod* Back to rawing it and some exercise is needed.